My food addiction

I have so many feelings about the word “diet”. This year I didn’t make one new years resolution because my goals for my life hasn’t change just because another year has started. BUT my goal for better health is still my number one goal. I have realized in the last few months that my relationship to food is so much more of a deeper issue then I expected. It was taking place of my relationship with God! I know that sounds so silly, but think about it. What do you turn too when your upset, need a lift, need something to make you happy? For me it was food. Every time I was upset, I craved chocolate and sweets, every time I needed a pick me up I grabbed coffee or a soda. Every time I was hungry I grabbed chips and junk food. I never truly craved anything that was good for me, including the Lord.

Anyway, as some of you know I started reading a book called Made to crave by Lysa Terkhurst. It has been my eye opening experience that I needed and has changed the way I look at how I resolve my issues. Today Lysa pretty much broke down a gist of what her book is about and I HIGHLY recommend reading her blog post for today.

http://lysaterkeurst.com/2012/01/the-war-against-my-soul

Her title for this blog is something that most people would never think that food would be a “war for your soul” but it is. Just like anything else, food is taking over our lives and becoming that filler instead of what it was naturally intended for. My issues with my body and my health has just as strong of an effect over me therefore making me go to the one thing that temporarily fixes it, food. I take no credit in this new discovery of my food addiction. I mean, I knew my issues where MUCH deeper but Lysa Terkhurst lays it all out in a way that really helped me examine my soul.

My mama is going to start a “Made to Crave” group and blog more deeply about our journey. I encourage you to join us in February. Grab the book, dig deep and go thru this with other women who share in the same struggles. This is NOT A DIET BOOK!!! Just a way to open up your eyes to what is the most important thing you can put in your body, more so then food… Jesus

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Brag time

It’s so hard for me to not brag about my husband and his accomplishments. In the last three years of our marriage he has earned almost every trip with his company and we have traveled to more places then I could have ever imagined. This April we went to the Dominican Republic and we took our 3 month old daughter with us. So to say that it was a true vacation would be a stretch.

But, we just got word that he earned the BIG TRIP of the year and we are going on a Baltics Cruise!!!! Now I am not saying all of this to brag about our trips. NO! I am bragging about my Husband, Brett A. Carpenter Jr.

My Husband has been the rock and head of this house. Even though every year at his job seems to get harder, he always presses through and makes it. I KNOW that he is a prayer warrior. Even when things are changing in our house, he always finds time to pray and do devotions. Never do I doubt my husbands relationship with the Lord. With his passion of worship and relationships, I see Jesus in him.

And let me tell you about how incredibly hard this man works!! His drive for perfection could make anyone go crazy!! His passion for what he does makes him who he is and why I believe he is so successful! YES. We have our battles. This year has proven to be one of the hardest. There have been many days where I can see worry and defeat on his face. But then he always pulls himself up and makes it to work another day. His co-workers respect him. His bosses rely on him. He is a man of his word. If I was working, I would want him on my team. 🙂

BJ… You are Amazing!!!! I love you more than words can express. Everyday there is something new that I love about you!! Thank you for putting up with me and everything that has been happening in our house. 🙂 We have been through a lot of changes in the last few months. And I truly believe there are a ton more changes to come. And I wouldn’t want to do it with anyone else but you!!!! You are the man of my dreams. You are everything I need in a husband!!! And you are the BEST dad in the world!!!! I love the way Sage looks at you! I love the way she “talks” to you! I know that she will grow to love and admire you just like I do with my daddy! I will never regret the day I said yes to marry you. And I will never look back on that day that I married you!!!!! Thank you for being who you are. Even if you hum all the time and act like a boy ALL THE TIME!!! I know I would miss it… maybe 😉

I LOVE YOU BJ!!! You are my world, my rock, my one and only…. And I am SO SO PROUD OF YOU!!!!

Congratulations baby!! You deserved this trip!!

 

Slow to speak

I am one to talk. A lot. (no harsh comments, I know I’m not the quiet type) But as I “advance” in life I seem to ALWAYS have a comment to a conversation. It’s time that I re-learn my listening skills.

With just having a baby it’s so hard to not talk about just her and my experiences all the time. Although I am no pro and will never consider myself one, the baby is not all that I have to talk about. There is so much more in life then my child. I can defiantly say that she is pretty stinkin close to being “my world”. I mean, really, everything I do revolves around that child now. But I am into so much more then just her.

I KNOW, I KNOW…. your all saying “But Cherith, thats what happens when you have a baby. Everyone expects that.”

Well, Not me! My whole life I have not been a pro at relationships. Especially with my friends. I am not one to just listen to a conversation and NOT have an opinion. I think that some people just want to vent, or talk, or maybe want your opinion but NOT your life story!! And thats my problem. I need to be slow to speak. Listen for a time when input is needed. Not when I think it’s always right.

I noticed this when I was talking with some old friends a few weeks ago. Instead of asking them about their lives and their new babies I proceeded to inform them about me… UGH…. “SLOW TO SPEAK CHERITH”

Fortunately, these girls know me and probably weren’t to shocked that I talked about Sage and my birth experience and my whole 2 months of being a mom. (to those girls, I am truly sorry. I want to know more about your lives and whats going on… I should have just shut up!)

It is even biblical that we need to be slow to speak

James 1:19 “My dear brothers, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak…”

Learning to focus and listen to someone else is such a talent. I admire the people that can TRULY listen to a conversation, give advice, and follow up in days to come remembering everything that was talked about.

I want to be like that! I want to be a better friend. I know that my life’s circumstances have changed and that most of my conversations will evolve around my child and me being a stay at home mom… but I want to be so much more then that. Just a better person.. a better friend…

To all of the girls and woman in my life…. thank you. Thank you for understanding my character and excepting me the way I am.

Loud. Talkative. Opinionated. New at this…

My life in Ruins…

Tonight I sit in my living room an emotional WRECK!!! Not that being pregnant is helping that fact… But when the world hits.. it hits HARD!!

To know that God is in control is an under statement. Because that is evident. There is just this side of me that wants to TAKE the control. Not because I feel like I can do it better. But because I want it NOW. Like the little selfish rich girl in Willy Wonka and her famous song about wanting the Goose that lays the golden Eggs “… I want today… I want tomorrow..”

I want answers. I want fixes.

But I NEED Jesus.

I NEED his guidance.

Although I feel like everything is crumbling underneath me at this very moment, I know God has control regardless.

I have no idea where this quote came from but it is what I am sticking to for quite awhile.

“God grant me the serenity to accept the things that I can not change,  courage to change the things I can, and WISDOM to know the difference.”

AMEN

And then He spoke

Well, so I thought. I’m not sure.

See, I’m debating. Whether or not God spoke to me. Cause I thought he did. I thought his plan for me was clear. But then someone else “spoke”… and my thoughts changed.

Have you ever felt that way? Confident in what you thought God was saying to you… and then, It changes.

Usually, me and God are pretty clear. In a sense, I know in my heart what to do. Sometimes he puts you in uncomfortable positions to make you want to get out. But not this time. There was not discomfort, no uneasy feeling, just what I thought, was clarity.

But it’s not. Not this time.

See, here’s my dilemma. I’m in between what to do with my life RIGHT NOW. Not down the road. I know what God has for me down the road. This is just for now. I have a job that I love. The hours are not great, nor is the pay, but who cares?? When your in a “happy place” for the most part, all the time, you don’t question it. But then when the opportunity to have an actual career of something else that you love comes by, you want that too. I told my husband that I am to dedicated to, to many things, and therefore, I only want one job. Good pay or not. As long as I’m happy.

But what happens when your happy with both things. I got a taste of a career that I dream of, and I work at I place that I DO love.

Is God ever unclear? NO… we, as humans doubt or debate God when he speaks. The bible says that his voice is like THUNDER! And he does things that we will never understand. Yet, we think we understand and we know what’s best or whatever.

Anyways, God is speaking… I’m just having a hard time listening. Just because not only do I want what is best for me, but for my family as well.

Listening… we try, we fight about it, we contemplate it, we love it, we hate it… Listening is more then just hearing, BUT DOING. To make an effort to hear something. Effort… something done by exertion or hard work.

Listening takes effort, hard work, and an attempt to make sense of it all. And Doing something about it.

I’m listening, quitely, or loudly… how ever you see it… but I’m listening